Life can be one continuous giggle, if, like me, you have filthy mind, a juvenile sense of humour, and you're lucky enough to live in Japan.

There is a loan company here in Japan called "AIKU". Or at least it was, until recently, in a moment of managerial brilliance, they decided to change their name... to "DICK". Ok, I exaggerate slightly - it's actually DIKKU, but I feel it's close enough in pronunciation to warrant me pointing it out.

What makes it even better is this promo picture. I'm not even going to bother explaining what thoughts go through my mind when I see this girl, in this pose, advertising for DIKKU.

Vietnam (part 2)

Click here to read part 1.

For the sake of my sanity, I've decided to write this in point form:

• Bargaining in Vietnam - I don't know that I'm really cut out for haggling with shop keepers - I'm a bloody wuss. When they started by offering a price that to me was a tenth of what I would have paid in Australia or Japan, I was happy to pay it. But Aunty M got annoyed at me, and took over the haggling for me. We'd communicate in Japanese to say how much lower we should go. Of course, when she wasn't there, I got weak. I got stalked by some old guy desperate to sell me a collection of old Vietnamese stamps. I made the mistake of looking too long, and he proceeded to latch onto my arm like a pitbull and beg me to buy it off him for a good 3 blocks. After the 2nd block, I saw some rich-looking foreigners coming the other way - relieved because I figured he'd give up on me and go after the money. No such luck. He then yelled something at me and walked away. I kept on walking around after that, and thought I was safe, but made a few wrong turns, and ended up in the place where I first came across him, at which point he started begging again. I gave in, and bought the collection for what was originally priced at US$45 for US$10. On the plus side, I did manage to get some cheap clothes and luggage... but again, that's thanks to Aunty M.
  


• Money for nuthin' - Funniest thing that happened to me on the trip - Aunty M and I were doing the touristy bit at the Temple of Literature, and we were looking through the souvenir shop, and all the souvenirs everywhere in Vietnam start to look the same after a while. I came across a bowl full of old coins, and just casually started sifting through them. I didn't know where they were from, and didn't see any point in buying them, until, as I was leaving, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a 100 yen coin. Then I sifted around, I found more and more. The beauty of this being that they were being sold for what turned out to be 75 yen... So I bought a wad of 100 yen coins, and some other souvenirs, and I ended up about breaking even. He he he.

There is a fair bit more to write, but I'm too tired now. Will write part 3 in a few days, I hope, before I go skiing... really looking forward to that. Until then, my photos of Vietnam are here for the meantime (half of them are thanks to Aunty M).

Vietnam (part 1)

Vietnam. A land where the food is cheap and delicious, the people are plentiful, and crossing the road is a death-defying exercise in dodging an oncoming wave of scooters - much akin to the game "Frogger" (see picture to the right). We (Aunty M and I) would have cars and scooters coming us like bats out of hell from every which direction, and like frogger, getting to the other side of the road would require a highly complicated combination of forward - back - forward - left - left - left - forward - back - do the hokey-pokey and turn around - scream - run to the other side. And then when our fearless frogger would be negotiating his way over logs and crocodiles, we had to weave our way through cyclos and over drains and pass vendors to make it to the relative safety of the sidewalk (see photo below). My frogger skills are now perfected.


In fact, this photo was taken from a cafe with a good view of the city. That's originally why I went up there, but then the waitress shoved a menu in front of me, so I had no choice but to order lunch. I decided to go the mango juice, and I flicked through the menu for something to eat, and the cheeseburger just sort of jumped out at me, so I decided to have that without even thinking. As I was giving my order to the waitress, I was halfway through saying "and a cheeseburger" when I suddenly started to regret it - here I was on my first day in Vietnam, and the first thing I eat is a cheeseburger! Sure enough, the waitress smirks and says to me "Big culture day, huh!" and walked away shaking her head.

I just wanted to die. I wanted the balcony to collapse and bury me alive. I felt so stupid. I told Aunty M, and as far as I know, she still hasn't stopped laughing at me. She even went out of her way to tell everyone we met on the trip all about it, and promised a horrible retribution if I didn't write about it on the blog. So here it is. I now have a complex about it. 'Nuff said.

Anyway, here are some photos from around Hanoi. Part 2 of my time in Vietnam will come later.











NB: I'd just like to point out that the last three photos were taken by Aunty M. Thank you.

Outta here

I've been on a cleaning binge recently.

If I had've known that using a cocktail of anti-mildew cleaning products in a small, poorly ventilated space could get you smacked-off-your-face, high-as-a-kite, I'd've made scrubbing out my bathroom a weekly event. Of course, I could always clean out my ventilator fan, but that would just ruin all my fun. That, and the occasional 'tap-tap-taping' I hear in the roof leads me to believe that there is something alive up there... and if I invade its territory it might get angry. I think I'll leave it alone for now.

In other news (as though any part of my life was remotely newsworthy...), I am going to Vietnam on thursday. Of course, given the cheap-arse airline I'm flying with, there is no real guarantee that I'll actually make it there, and I'll probably end up being sold into white slavery (again), but it's the thought that counts. I'll be gone for a 1 week holiday, and I'll take as many photos with my technologically defunct digital camera and its 60-second life span battery as I can.